30 March 2010


March 30, 2010 2 Comments
tangan tak tergapai
kaki tak terjejak
mulut tak terkata
lidah tak terangkat
mata tak terbuka
telinga tak terdengar
hidung tak terhidu

aku di awangan
mencari tanah utk dijejak
mengharap pada graviti untuk menarik aku ke realiti
mungkin tamparan akan menyedarkan aku
tak kira apa caranya
aku mahu jejak segera ke tanah
mahu rasa kerasnya tanah
mahu lihat terangnya pemandangan
mahu hidu wanginya bunga
mahu ucap sebaik-baik perkataan
kembalikan aku kepada realiti
kerana tanggungjawab syahadahku tak tertunai lagi.

17 March 2010


March 17, 2010 2 Comments
the calendar has reach the middle of March yet when i looked at the archive in the right corner of  
T_T -__- xD, there's only one entry had been posted.
well, it is not a big problem.

father advised me to reduce my time on the blog, and more time to study, as i give bad description about my mid year exam, of course, before the results were shown up.
well, yet it is not a big problem.

the end of march is approaching yet i still don't know what i've study for the End March Exam (Patho),
and this is a big problem.

2nd term is so short, and the knowledge is 'mountain-ing' especially pharma.

slides to be remembered, jar to be studied, tuition to be attended.
still not include the sports and the cultural day. (i escape both, sorry)

to many things to be done, study groups, past year Q, notes, reading, etc..
plus money 'short-circuit'

it feels like the world is holding-gripping-suffocating me 
in its hand from all its corners, 
that i couldn't even release my grip
 to gasp the rope to heaven.

I, as human being, should be the reversed, indeed.
I should gasp the world in my grip, not the world does it to me.
I shouldn't be the slave to the Dunya.
I should use the Dunya, not being used by it.
I should order the world, not the world order me.

i'm slightly exhausted, and getting tired to find the best way for me in everything i do.
method to study this and that.
time for this and that.
focus on this and that.
manage this and that.
but i know i haven't did anything yet, and not enough yet.
the test is running, and it may last for a month,
pray to Allah, the source of every Power and Energy, to lend us(me) some of the Qudrat to face all these things.
pray for the guidance and clear decision to be make.
pray for tranquility and peacefulness in every step we walked.
pray for every moments give us barakah and his Redha.
pray for a pure heart, or a new heart to feel His Greatness.
pray for an alertness in every matter around us.
pray for an obeyed heart and eye from wandering unpurposely to ajnabi.
pray for a purified heart from bad thoughts and feelings about others.
pray for a silent mouth rather than talkative but nothing than an empty can of Pepsi.
pray for a freedom from any bonds that entangling us from being nearer to the God.
pray for our own good, Dunya and the Thereafter.
and then go to realize your target and dreams.
pray are nothing if we don't work it.
same as planning.
but do follow the steps.
pray before, during, and after.

it's 1:41 am, i plan to sleep. =D

07 March 2010


March 07, 2010 4 Comments
i sat at the corner.
looking inside with plain sight.
neurons keep discharging their neurotransmitter actively.
the buccinator, masseter, orbicularis oris, and minor muscles keep contracting and relaxing.
some lower limbs muscle contract the hip towards the earth, and some of other contract the knee joint straight.
they repeat for several times to perform their tongue.
the audience might suffer from numbness, trapped between two edges.
the words end with lacrimation and tears.
the physical heart stop from tachy to brady.
the virtual heart turns from unsatisfied to forgiveness.
and the crowds went home.
cant wait to relax every single functioning workers in their body.

selemah2 ukhwah adalah berlapang dada.
luv you akhawat gen07.